Reviews on Previews

After two long years, I am reintroducing former Urban School student and Urban Legend staff writer Lily Dodd’s concept of reviewing upcoming cinematic works based exclusively on their trailers. I have not seen these movies, and I may never. After a few minutes of previews, I have prepared my thoughts based on what I believe these movies are about. Hopefully, my insights will guide you through the endless cinematic options that Hollywood provides as you plan your upcoming fall and winter breaks.


Justice League – November 17

Once again, Marvel surprises no one with the latest film in the hit series, “Hot People Throw Things and Play with CGI Effects.”


Coco – November 22

Pixar kills it once again in this sassy, skeletal adventure, choosing once more to give yet  another inanimate object feelings.


Wonder Wheel – December 1

This new Woody Allen film builds its plot around a 1950s oversaturated Coney Island aesthetic.


Ferdinand – December 15

This animated film takes a wonderful children’s book and regrettably gives the lead role of a shy and gentle bull to WWE wrestler John Cena. Not even SNL’s Kate Mckinnon can save this disgusting movie. Did they even read the book?


The Greatest Showman – December 20

Fox TV’s “Glee” returns as a 20th century circus, celebrating individuality through catchy bops and dance numbers.


Pitch Perfect 3 – December 22

“Glee” returns, part two.


Father Figures – December 22

In this “bro show” (instead of chick flick, get it?), grown men with daddy issues go on a road trip.


Molly’s Game – December 25

More or less the “Wolf of Wall Street” with a powerful woman at the helm.


Phantom Thread – December 25

Spend the entirety of this artsy movie guessing what kind of accent the female love interest is supposed to have.